Sallie Darlington to Elizabeth (Abbot) Bowditch, 30 June 1860

[From Sallie Darlington in West Chester, Pennsylvania, to Elizabeth (Abbot) Bowditch. She expresses her joy in getting a letter from Elizabeth after three years, and apologizes for not writing to her; congratulates her on her many children, and thanks her for giving her latest the middle name Darlington; says she's glad her husband will be "putting his farming views into practice," and says she and her father aren't very qualified to give advice on planning a house; comments about news Elizabeth told her about various people in Tarboro; updates Elizabeth on her family; and says she's in good health, and is working as a teacher, teaching older students (16-36) who are themselves either becoming teachers or already working as teachers.]

West Chester June 30th/60

My dear Mrs. Bowditch,

I cannot tell you how very glad I was once more to see your handwriting after so long a silence, nor could I enumerate the many times that I have fully determined to write to you, but again have not done so from the thought that perhaps you would not care to resume our correspondence after so long an interruption. I can scarcely realize that almost three years have passed since I last heard from you, and yet on looking back it seems a long, long time. I have been from home a great deal during that time and always very closely engaged with my studies, but I do not pretend to offer that as an excuse for not having written to you; I assure you however it was not from want of interest in you and yours, but, to tell the honest truth, after I had allowed some months to pass without writing, I was ashamed to write, and of course every week and month only made the matter worse. As I am on the stool of confession however I will add, that more than a year ago I commenced a letter to you intending to rely on your good nature to excuse past remissness, but I was so dissatisfied with the excuses which I had to offer for my long silence that I threw my letter into the fire and despaired of ever hearing from you again. Let me then repeat how extremely glad I was to see your familiar handwriting, and I do assure you it will not be my fault if our correspondence should ever again cease.

You quite surprise me with the number of your little folks, but knowing your love for children I most heartily congratulate you. You were very, very kind to think of me and to associate my name with one of your little ones,1 and most fully do I appreciate it. I hope at some future day (and not very far in the future either) to have the pleasure of seeing the little fellow, who is indeed my first namesake. It seems that Georgiana2 is fated to be the belle of the family; I often wonder if she has grown up as pretty as I predicted she would, for I always thought she would make a beautiful woman. I am glad to hear Nat3 is at the North, now that his constitution is forming, for he always seemed like a child that required bracing up with clear, cool breezes.

I am very glad that Mr. Bowditch4 intends putting his farming views into practice; I did not believe he ever would be satisfied till he did so, and now that he has so many sons coming on, a farm is the very best place for them. I hope you will succeed in planning a house to your fancy, and wish I could throw some light on the subject. Pa5 says he is sorry to say he is a very poor person to apply to for information in the matter, as he has never built a dwelling house; his experience has only been in planning public buildings, two or three of which in our town he thinks he has managed admirably. I have but one very decided idea with regard to houses, and that is, a dislike to high houses; two stories are a great abundance, do you not think so?

I am very sorry indeed to hear of the changes by death that have taken place among you. Mrs. Parker6 & Mrs. Clark7 I supposed could scarcely be living; they both seemed feeble when last I saw them. Mr. Weddel8 must be left very desolate; you remember we often used to remark on his devotion to his wife,9 or rather, how evident he made his devotion.

Give my kindest regards to Mrs. Owen;10 I am glad to hear her health allows her to continue her school. I suppose Martha11 is quite a young lady, and I venture to say a very intelligent one, judging from what she was as a child.

How glad I am to find Miss Bella12 plays the organ, and Mr. Chapman13 still leads the choir; I could not bear to think that strangers to me were occupying those places with which I have so many and such pleasant associations. Is my good friend Dr. Baker14 still among them? I have a few tunes that I shall always associate in my mind with him. He used to try so hard to have them performed in good time. When you next write, pray tell me about everybody; all the girls I suppose are married. Are Malvena and Catharine still with you, and is the latter as smart as ever? How many a hearty laugh she has afforded us. But I should fill twenty letters were I to ask all the questions I would like to, so for the present I must stop, and occupy my remaining space with answers to some of your queries.

Our family has undergone very few changes within the last three years. Pa keeps about the same, though I can see he is growing old, as a man of 78 years must necessarily show age. He is still President of the Bank, and spends all his time in reading and writing as he always has done, his faculties not being at all impaired. My niece Netty15 of whom I so often spoke has been married about eighteen months to a young country physician.16 She lives on a farm and is very happy, having become a regular managing little housekeeper, tho she still looks like a girl of sixteen. Walter17 lives with us; he is so essential to his Grandpa's comfort, that my brother18 is obliged to let us have him. Kate19 enjoys very good health, and I have been very much better during the last two years. My throat has entirely recovered, and my general health is very good. For a long time I have been studying very closely to prepare myself for the position I now hold in the Normal School here, so you see I am teaching again, though I am happy to say it is not Music this time. I have classes in Latin, German, French and one or two English branches; my pupils are young ladies and gentlemen, mixed in classes indiscriminately, whose ages range from sixteen to thirty six, most of them preparing to teach, and many of them teachers of some years standing, who come in to our school to improve in certain studies; of course, all being eager to improve, teaching becomes a pleasant occupation to one, who like myself has a fancy for it. I like my position extremely; there are three other teachers engaged in the school, each having his or her own branches to attend to. My duties keep me pretty busy, which must account for my not replying to your letter immediately, but I was obliged to wait till Saturday which is my only half-holiday.

I have written you a fearfully long letter, but I could find no stopping place. Give my love to Georgiana2 and Mr. Bowditch.4 When you write again, which I hope will be soon, tell me how your sisters and brothers are and have been. Your sister Ellen20 was one of the sweetest girls I ever met; I hope she is still living and well. I have had a young lady21 staying with me for the last six months for the purpose of studying German, who reminds me somewhat of your sister. She is also from Massachusetts, a daughter of Dr. Cutter.22

As you will readily believe, penmanship is not one of the branches I teach at school; however, I never apologize for my writing, as it is so evident that an apology is necessary, it seems useless to go through with the form of offering one. Give a kiss to each of your little flock for me with an extra one to my little namesake, and believe me as ever

Yours sincerely

Sallie

Be kind enough to remember me to Mr. & Mrs. Cheshire23 and Miss Bella;12 also to Mr. Chapman.13

Pa5 and Kate19 send kind regards to yourself and Mr. Bowditch.4

  1. Frederick Darlington Bowditch (1859-1920), Elizabeth's son
  2. Georgiana Abbot Bowditch (1848-1927), Elizabeth's daughter
  3. Nathaniel Ingersoll Bowditch (1846-1913), Elizabeth's son
  4. Joseph Henry Bowditch (1818-1900), Elizabeth's husband
  5. William Darlington (1782-1863), Sallie's father
  6. Mary Toole (1787-1858)
  7. Arabella Toole (1782-1860), Mary (Toole) Parker's sister
  8. Matthew Weddell (1813-1888)
  9. Maria Toole Clark (1813-1859), Arabella (Toole) Clark's daughter
  10. Mary Blount McCotter (1811-1876)
  11. Martha Blount Owen (1844-1924), Mary (McCotter) Owen's daughter
  12. Arabella Clark Parker (1831-1912), Mary (Toole) Parker's daughter
  13. Russell Chapman (1802-1874)
  14. Joseph Henry Baker (1831-1902)
  15. Jannetta Haslett Darlington (1838-1898), daughter of Sallie's brother John Lacey Darlington
  16. James A. Levengood (1829-)
  17. Walter Franklin Darlington (1848-1924), son of Sallie's brother Edward C. Darlington
  18. Edward C. Darlington (1819-1874), Sallie's brother
  19. Catharine Lacy Darlington (1823-1886), Sallie's sister
  20. Ellen Louisa Abbot (1837-1887), Elizabeth's sister
  21. Catharine Eliza Cutter (1842-1862). She lived with the Darlington family for more than six months in the winter of 1859/60, and was later invited to travel to Europe with Sarah, but the trip was abandoned when the Civil War began.
  22. Calvin Cutter (1807-1872)
  23. Joseph Blount Cheshire (1814-1899) and Elizabeth Toole Parker (1820-1895)